高中生英语笑话大全

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笑话是幽默的一个属概念 ,具有幽默的一切特征。笑话是民族特有幽默的一种形式。小编精心收集了高中生英语笑话,供大家欣赏学习!

高中生英语笑话大全
  高中生英语笑话:job interview

An engineer, a physicist1, and a lawyer were being interviewed for a position as chief executive officer of a large corporation. The engineer was interviewed first, and was asked a long list of questions, ending with "How much is two plus two?"

The engineer excused himself, and made a series of measurements and calculations before returning to the board room and announcing, "Four."

The physicist was next interviewed, and was asked the same questions. Before answering the last question, he excused himself, made for the library, and did a great deal of research. After aconsultation2 with the United States Bureau of Standards and many calculations, he also announced "Four."

The lawyer was interviewed last, and was asked the same questions. At the end of his interview, before answering the last question, he drew all the shades in the room, looked outside the door to see if anyone was there, checked the telephone for listening devices, and asked "How much do you want it to be?"

  高中生英语笑话:heaven

Following a distinguished1 legal career, a man arrived at the Gates of Heaven, accompanied by the Pope, who had the misfortune to expire on the same day. The Pope was greeted first by St. Peter, who escorted him to his quarters. The room was somewhat shabby and small, similar to that found in a low grade Motel 6 type establishment. The lawyer was then taken to his room, which was a palatial2 suite3 including a private swimming pool, a garden, and a terrace overlooking the Gates. The attorney was somewhat taken aback, and told St. Peter, "I'm really quite surprised at these rooms, seeing as how the Pope was given such small accommodations."

St. Peter replied, "We have over a hundred Popes here, and we're really very bored with them. We've never had a lawyer."

  高中生英语笑话:Valentines Day Cards

A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged1, balding man standing2 at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. The balding man then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying them all.

His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing. The man says, "I'm sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'"

"But why?" asks the man.

"I'm a divorce lawyer."

  高中生英语笑话:A Brain Transplant 脑移植手术

A Brain Transplant

The Brain Surgeon was about to perform a brain transplant. You have your choice of two brains, he told the patien. For $1000 you can have the brain of a psychologist, or for $10,000 you can have the brain of a politician. The patient was amazed at the huge difference in price. Is the brain of a politician that much better? he asked. The Brain Surgeon replied, No, it’s not better, just unused.

脑移植手术

一个外科医生正要作一个脑移植手术。 你可以从两个脑子中选一个给你。医生告诉病人,一个心理学家的大脑1000美元,一个政治家的大脑10000美元。 病人很惊讶二者之间这样大的差别,政治家的大脑好一些吗?他问。 医生说,不是好一些,只是没有用过。

  高中生英语笑话:Thats a real bargain

A Dublin lawyer died in poverty, and many people donated to a fund for his funeral. The Lord Chief Justice of Orbury was asked to donate a shilling. "Only a shilling?" said the Justice, "Only a shilling to bury an attorney? Here's a guinea; go and bury twenty more of Them."


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