我的婚姻是开放式的,但我们都没有和其他人发生关系

词汇语 人气:1.93W

I'm in an open marriage. Well, to be simultaneously more specific: I'm in a nonmonogamous marriage.

我的婚姻是开放式的。同时,更具体一点,我的婚姻并不是一夫一妻制的。

An "open" marriage, in the nontraditional world, means that the couple may be having sex with other people but with no emotion involved. In contrast, in a "poly-amorous" relationship, it means the couple is having sex with others and may also be having full-fledged relationships with others.

在非传统的世界中,"开放式"婚姻意味着夫妻双方可以和他人发生没有感情的性关系。相反,在"多元感情"的关系中,这意味着夫妻可以和他人发生性关系,也可以与他人产生感情。

For my husband and I, a non-monogamous marriage means that we're not subscribing to the traditional notion of sexual monogamy being required in a marriage. It means that we don't believe that the only way to be sexual in a marriage is with each other. It means that we're okay with the idea of sexual exploration.

于我和我的丈夫而言,非一夫一妻制的婚姻意味着我们不赞成婚姻必须一夫一妻的传统观念。这意味着我们认为婚姻中的性关系不单存在于彼此间。这意味着我们对性探索的想法也是可以接受的。

我的婚姻是开放式的,但我们都没有和其他人发生关系

You see, the importance of an "open" marriage to me has nothing to do with getting to have sex with others, or having sex with others, or planning to have sex with others. Those factors are things that most people think of when they think of an open marriage, but they are secondary to the most important part of an open marriage: the openness.

于我而言,"开放式"婚姻的重要性与能够和他人发生性关系或打算与他人发生性关系无关。大多数人想到开放式婚姻就会想到这些因素,但这些只是开放式婚姻的次要因素,首要因素还是:开放。

I have never been a big fan of being restricted or constrained in any way. For a long time, I railed against the idea of commitment in any and all forms. It was for this exact reason that while there was no great difficulty in my deciding to get married to the only man I've ever met that made me believe in the idea of "The One," there was some difficulty in adjusting to the idea of "marriage." My husband knew, from the moment he met me, that I wasn't the traditional sort, so neither of us ever thought we'd have anything other than a non-monogamous marriage. That said, even adapting to the idea of a non-monogamous "marriage" was difficult.

我从来都不喜欢被限制。很长时间以来,我都反对任何形式的承诺。正因如此,虽然在决定与我相识的唯一一个让我有"就是他了"念头的男人结婚时,我没有遇到太大阻碍,但适应"婚姻"这个念头却有点困难。从遇到我的那一刻起,丈夫就知道我不是传统的女人,所以我们从来都未曾想过非一夫一妻制以外的其它婚姻。也就是说,即使习惯非一夫一妻制的"婚姻"概念也是十分困难的。

My husband and I both had a strong desire to understand each other and make our marriage work. I, of course, wanted to try to open my "commitment" boundaries in order to create a beautiful marriage with my husband. He wanted to try to understand non-monogamy, so that we could both be open about our desires.

我和我丈夫都非常希望能够理解彼此,希望能好好经营我们的爱情。当然,我也希望能越过自己的"承诺"界限,和丈夫共建一个美满的婚姻。他也想试着理解非一夫一妻制,这样我们就能敞开心扉,互诉衷肠。

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